Thursday, October 16, 2003

I have found a website for Christian kids that explains all the facts about life and the universe. No longer will my mind be poisoned by the fallacies of modern science. I found out that the T-Rex was an herbivore, so the little creatures of the Ark were safe from harm. I also found out that dinosaurs still roam the Earth! Yet, strangely, I found out that dinosaurs died out during the Great Flood. Another nugget of Truth: the Bombardier Beetle shoots an acidic stream out of it's ass as a defense against evil AND as a testament against the false doctrine of Evolution!

Did you know that kangaroos lived in the Middle East? According to this website, they did! They just weren't mentioned in the inventory of the Ark because of all the sheep , cattle, and velociraptors(which must have been herbivores as well). "There is also an alternative theory that some kangaroos and other baramins destined for Australia "rafted" across the Tethys Sea on floating mats of vegetation ripped up by the Flood. However, this is still "controversial" quoteth the Website Of Ultimate Truth. About this time, my eyes began to dry out from bugging out of my head.

Let's look at a couple more.

1. There exists on the Earth a kangaroo called Hopsiah, The Kanga-Jew.

2. If you find out that an Atheist lives in you neighborhood, you must RUN and tell you parents or minister! AVOID TALKING TO THEM!

3. Polytheists are sad because they have too many gods.

4. Giraffes and moths can be friends.

5. Evolution goes against the Second Law Of Thermodynamics.

Amen.

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